Toronto's Buy Nothing Day Critical Mass Ride

David Fingrut (
Sat, 30 Nov 1996 03:48:29 +0000 (GMT)

Twas dark and quite chilly at about 6pm
When the Critical Mass came together again
They had snow on their fingers and chills in their feet
But they met up as usual on Temperance Street

The cyclists all knew that the hour had drawn near
'Cause the Hideous White Noise couriers had finished their beer
And to begin the big ride needed no starter pistols
Everybody took off at the sound of bike whistles

They rode north on Bay Street and west along Queen
Past the Wanna-Be-Hip-and-Alternative scene
Then they biked along King Street and then up Spadina
Through Chinatown at night - it could not have been finer

Then east along Dundas they continued to ride
Two hundred bike activists grinning with pride
While avoiding the toxic car's tires and fenders
Till somebody yelled out "Let's take The Eaton Centre!"

The Eaton Centre (Toronto's big shopping mall)
Its owned by an anti-union company and all
Of the stores were open for their shopping foray
Little did they care it was Buy Nothing Day!

The ride went past Trinity Church just off of Bay Street
And soon enough the cyclists had come up to meet
With the doors of the shopping mall loaded with crap
Like The Disney Store, McDonald's, Calvin Klein and The Gap

The cyclists confronted the corporate-crap buyers
With cheers of 'Buy Nothing!' and 'Buy Nothing Day' flyers
And they sprinkled the flyers from over the railing
Down onto the heads of Santa Claus they went sailing

Then they biked out the eastern door back onto Yonge Street
(Avoiding the bike cops who'd been trailing them was sweet)
And then back to the Standby Cafe for a beer and
Shouts of "Same Time next month!" were answered in cheer.

David Fingrut