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(en) Freedom 6405 8 Mar, 2003 - Industrial relations as presented by the media can be baffling, so we offer ... A guide for the perplexed

From Worker <a-infos-en@ainfos.ca>
Date Sun, 6 Apr 2003 08:01:56 +0200 (CEST)

A - I N F O S N E W S S E R V I C E

The ongoing firefighters' dispute has provoked a rash
of media and New Labour hysteria and venom. Terms
like 'modernisation', 'union dinosaur' and the like
have been bandied about as if people knew what they
meant. Here's a modest attempt to help everyone to
understand the media and New Labourite Newspeak.

'40% pay rise' - a totally unacceptable figure, unless
it's for politicians and bosses.

'placing lives in danger' - a totally unacceptable thing
to do, unless politicians and bosses do it (see

'modernisation' - a return to the workplace feudalism
of the nineteenth century.

'flexibility' - doing what your boss tells you, when it
suits them.

'government for all the people' - government for the
capitalist class.

'sectional interests' - the interests of anyone bar the
capitalist class Ğ i.e. the interests of the majority.
See 'undemocratic'.

'high wage increases' - selfish, unacceptable demands
by those who actually do the work. By definition, bad
for 'the economy' (q.v.).

'high profits' - unselfish, altruistic, acceptable
demands by those who give the orders. By definition,
good for 'the economy' (q.v.).

'union' - a form of free association which harms
'economic liberty' (q.v.) and can result in 'industrial
anarchy' (q.v.). An unacceptable reminder that
picking a master doesn't equal liberty. In extreme
cases that can turn into 'syndicalism' (q.v.).

'union bullies' - workers standing up for themselves
and placing 'economic liberty' (q.v.) in danger.

'union dinosaurs' - workers who don't wish their
rights to go the same way as the Stegosaurus, and
take annoyingly effective action which the
government and employers can't ignore (see 'direct

'strike' - an unacceptable and unpleasant reminder of
'the bad old days' (q.v.) and that the 'working class'
(q.v.) still exists and has power to change the world.
A particularly effective form of 'protest' (q.v.) and
'direct action' (q.v.).

'sympathy strikes' - unacceptably expressing selfish
regard for your fellow workers.

'the bad old days' - when working class people didn't
know their place and caused 'industrial anarchy'

'protest' - a right everybody has, but nobody should

'justice' - a clear sign that the speaker has not
subjected their ideas to 'modernisation' (q.v.).

'direct action' - any form of collective resistance
which unacceptably puts your betters into the
unpleasant situation of having to think about what
those affected by their decisions may think and want
(see 'working class'). By definition, 'undemocratic'

'industrial anarchy' - what results when people apply
the extremist nonsense that workers are human
beings and shouldn't have to leave their rights,
humanity and liberty at the workplace door.

'working class' - a class which doesn't exist, but
somehow manages to do all the work. Has been
known to effectively resist the decisions of the 'ruling
class' (q.v.) and stop their plans for the betterment of
'the economy' (q.v.)

'ruling class' - a class which doesn't exist but
somehow manages to govern the world and give the
orders. Has been known to be terrified of the
non-existent 'working class' (q.v.) and its power.

'democracy' - the embodiment of freedom, whereby a
handful of politicians, elected by 25% of the people,
do what they, the politicians, want for four years.
Anyone objecting to this 'government for all the
people' (q.v.) is simply expressing 'sectional
interests' (q.v.) and anyone turning words into action
is being 'undemocratic' (q.v.).

'undemocratic' - the embodiment of tyranny, whereby
the people affected by a decision collectively
organise themselves to influence it or, even worse,
make it themselves. Any attempt by people to
govern themselves, rather than letting those better
able to judge in the matter do so, is, by definition,
'undemocratic' (q.v.). See 'undemocratic anarchy'.

'the economy' - our new god, for which no sacrifice
made by you at our demand is unacceptable.

'economic liberty' - do what you are told or get fired.

'free market' - the natural order, as created and
maintained by state action. See 'laissez-faire'.

'capitalism' - another name for 'economic liberty'
(q.v.). An economy where people's choices are
unaffected by differences in wealth and power. The
embodiment of liberty, defined as having to sell that
liberty on the 'free market' (q.v.) in order to survive.

'the state' - an institution which has no place in the
'free market' (q.v.) and so must be gotten off our
back and onto the back of the 'working class' (q.v.).
See 'laissez-faire'.

'wealth creation' - the process by which the bosses
get both the credit and the goods produced by the
workers who sell their liberty to them.

'undemocratic anarchy' - the activity of those
extremists who believe in the nonsensical idea that
those affected by a decision should make it, rather
than leave power in the hands of a few politicians,
bureaucrats and capitalists. Inspired by 'anarchism'
(q.v.), these extremists use 'direct action' (q.v.) and
aim for 'anarchy' (q.v.).

'anarchism' - an evil doctrine which spreads the
nonsense that liberty is more than picking masters
and that another world is possible. See 'syndicalism'.

'syndicalism' - the industrial form of 'anarchism'
(q.v.). Promotes 'strikes' (q.v.) and other forms of
'direct action' (q.v.). This results in 'industrial
anarchy' (q.v.) and 'high wage increases' (q.v.). Can
lead to 'anarchy' (q.v.).

'anarchy' Ğ an impossible dream which, annoyingly
enough, has worked remarkably successfully when
put into practice. Based on the ridiculous notion that
humanity deserves a better way of living than
'capitalism' (q.v.) can provide and that society should
be composed of free people cooperating together as
equals, sharing the world to directly meet their needs
and desires.
Iain McKay

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